The Gift of Grief
As we move towards winter, I want to share why embracing grief is essential. Though it may seem counterintuitive, feeling grief fully opens us to more growth, joy, and presence.
“If in doubt, grieve.” – a poignant phrase I've heard from Vienna Pharaon. This phrase speaks to the essential role grief plays in our ability to evolve. We've been taught to resist the deep sadness of loss – whether that’s the loss of a loved one, a part of our identity, or even the childhood we needed but didn’t receive.
And yet, when we hold back on grief, we risk becoming stuck, anchored to a past that is not going to change. We can get caught re-enacting or trying to “solve” some past pain – fighting with reality rather than being with the loss of what is.
When we truly feel and honor the sensation of grief in our bodies, we start to release the weight of what was. Grieving, at its core, is an act of allowing. It’s a practice of acknowledging our losses so we can free ourselves from old attachments. Through grief, we let go. We let go of past versions of ourselves, old stories, people and places we loved, and step into a more present version of ourselves. We can then actually grow.
Here’s the surprising part: the more deeply we allow ourselves to grieve, the more space we create for joy. Grief cracks us open. As we feel and release the pain of loss, we become more open, more connected to ourselves, our vulnerability, and our empathy. This openness prepares us to experience joy and gratitude on a profound level, we become more receptive to the beauty of life now.
Each time we allow ourselves to truly grieve, we’re honoring the natural cycle of growth – trees don't cling to leaves that need to fall. As we move through life and the passage of time there will always be loss. This is part of the human experience. If you’re feeling stuck, maybe take a moment and let yourself grieve. You might find you open a door to new possibilities.
This year, we’ve faced a lot of collective grief—a shared sense of loss for lives and innocence around the world.
